Because I was Such a Fool
by Shiori Hitohana
Summary: Athrun and Cagalli’s breakup seems as though it would have consequences for the both of them…


A/N: I couldn't help but feel that Athrun and Cagalli's break-up was little more than a miscommunication, although a very bad one indeed, so I thought the two should realize such a thing.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed or Gundam Seed Destiny

* * *

**Because I was Such a Fool**

Athrun was pacing again.

Kira's violet eyes followed him tiredly back and forth while he remained seated on the couch. He and Lacus were visiting Orb for a week, and Mu and Murrue La Flaga, formerly Murrue Ramius, had graciously welcomed them to their home, where Athrun was already staying. Athrun had yet to decide where he wanted to remain; on Earth, in Orb, or in space, in the Plants.

Kira sighed, snapping Athrun out of his thoughts and back to the present. Kira stood, putting his hands on Athrun's shoulders.

"Look, Athrun…." he hesitated, unsure of exactly what he wanted to say to get his message through to Athrun. Athrun could be stubborn beyond reason at times, even to the point of foolishness.

"Go and see her, Athrun," Lacus' soft voice commanded as she entered.

Athrun looked between the two of them. "What are you talking about?"

Violet and blue eyes narrowed at him. "Don't play ignorant, Athrun!" Kira exclaimed, irritated. "You've been wearing a hole in the carpet for days, if not weeks, and you're driving everyone crazy!"

Athrun broke away from Kira's hands so he didn't have to face Kira's blazing eyes. They were too similar to that of Kira's sister….

Kira's eyes softened, though Athrun didn't see it. "Athrun. I'm not trying to get the two of you back together. But… you need to talk it out. It's not like you two can just ignore each other for the rest of your lives. You're driving yourself crazy."

Athrun walked away, towards the door, and hesitated, glancing back. "I'll think about it."

Kira smiled wryly, listening as Athrun's footsteps faded away. "That's all you've been doing, Athrun."

* * *

Cagalli looked off absently, and Colonel Kisaka knew that he would have to recap the meeting for her later. He sighed quietly from his post in the corner and leaned against the wall slightly. His frustration was beginning to grow, and he wished once again that she wouldn't put him through such trials.

Colonel Kisaka was one of Cagalli's adoptive father's closest advisors, and he had been trusted to guard Cagalli during the first war. Unfortunately, he was inept at guarding her from problems of her own creation.

The first time Cagalli had seen Athrun, she had fired her gun at him. Colonel Kisaka almost had to laugh at that. It was odd when one considered the fact that the two who had unwittingly placed the same doubts in Athrun's mind about ZAFT had been twins. Colonel Kisaka wasn't exactly certain what had happened at the end of this past war. Whatever had happened, the result was that Cagalli was distant at best, and had not gone to see Athrun, despite the fact that he was in the city.

The meeting ended, and the members dispersed back to their duties once more, startling Cagalli out of her reverie. Colonel Kisaka drew closer, and she looked at him with tired amber eyes.

"Sorry, Kisaka," she muttered.

He frowned at her. "Cagalli…"

She cut him off. "I can't go and see him, Kisaka…. If he wanted to see me, he would come. It wouldn't be kind of me to go."

He sighed. "Kira asked me to convey an invitation to dinner."

She shook her head. "I can't. Not now."

Kisaka looked skeptical, but honored her wishes and began to recap her on the meeting she had drifted off during.

* * *

Cagalli was staring out the window without seeing when there was a knock on the door of her chamber. She jerked, startled, before moving towards the door and opening it. She froze instantly.

Athrun stood at the door, green eyes glued to the floor. Neither of the two spoke for a long minute, and a guard, stationed at the end of the hallway, started forward slowly. Athrun finally looked into Cagalli's eyes, and she couldn't refuse him. She stepped aside, and he entered. The guard returned to his post, seeing that he was not needed. She settled herself on the windowsill again as Athrun took a chair.

The silence was tangible, and Cagalli couldn't look at Athrun. She was too busy pushing down the tears that she had bottled up inside her. She couldn't force them on him. He had been right; there were some things that couldn't be forgiven. She wasn't going to destroy what little they had left by allowing her pain to show.

Athrun stared at the floor of her room, which was hardly any different then what had been out in the hallway. He knew he should speak; or should she? He wasn't sure. She probably hadn't wanted to see him in the first place. He was destroying himself internally, but if he had to destroy her to save himself…he couldn't do it.

"I'm…sorry," Athrun finally murmured, standing up, his back towards her.

She flinched. "For what? I'm the one who should be sorry. Athrun…"

He shook his head, interrupting her. "I should have known what Durandal was doing earlier. I didn't listen to you, and Orb paid the price. If it weren't for me, maybe Orb wouldn't have been as bad off as it ended up."

"You're wrong. I was the one who hurt Orb…and you, Athrun. I'm sorry! I was such a fool! Yuna was just manipulating me, and I let him! I broke my promise…I understand. It's impossible for us to have ever gone back to the way we were after I did that. I…wish you and Meyrin happiness."

Athrun was stunned. "Meyrin?"

She nodded, unable to meet his eyes. She had caused him too much pain to ever hope for his forgiveness, but she still could not help that she loved him. And as she loved him, she had to let him live the life he deserved.

"Cagalli, I…I've never loved Meyrin as anything but a sister. I…I've been being a fool this whole time. I don't want to lose you again!"

Cagalli froze, and tears welled up in her eyes as her emotions overwhelmed her. Trepidation, hope, joy, love and a deep fear warred within her for dominance. But in the end, only one of them could have hoped to prevail.

Athrun looked at her anxiously, cursing himself for his stupidity. It had been wrong for him to come here. She hadn't wanted him after all, and now he was just causing her more pain then he had in the first place.

"Really?" Cagalli finally asked, her voice wavering.

Athrun's eyes widened, then, slowly, a small smile formed on his lips for the first time in a long time. "Yeah." He closed the distance between them and embraced her.

"Cagalli?" he murmured.

"Yes?"

"Will you marry me?"

She laughed despite the tears. "Of course. But you know, this isn't really the way you're supposed to ask a girl."

Athrun smiled. "We were both such fools."

* * *

A/N: I hope you enjoyed that. If you did, I would appreciate it if you would review or read another of my stories.

If you caught the three references to the series, good for you! If you didn't, I'll tell you right now.

"Because I was Such a Fool"-- or, if you would prefer, "Ore ga baka dakara." It's what Athrun told Cagalli was the reason he and Lacus had broken up.

"He had been right; there were some things that couldn't be forgiven."-- Reference to the episode where Athrun secretly meets Cagalli and Kira to find out their side of the story. He concludes his conversation by telling Cagalli there were "some things even I can't forgive," while glancing to her ring. In other words, her breaking the engagement.

"Of course. But you know, this isn't really the way you're supposed to ask a girl."-- Reference to an episode in the beginning of Gundam Seed Destiny, when he suddenly slipped the ring on her finger.


End file.
